How To Get Your Partner Excited About Investing In Property

Hey there. My name’s Ben Everingham and to kick off today’s video, I just wanted to say there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know property’s probably your passion and you’ve probably been watching some of my stuff and some other people’s stuff online and you’re like, “If only I could get my partner on board, everything would be sweet and it would be perfect for both of us,” but the reality is some partners just don’t care about investing in property like some people don’t care about going to the gym, and just because it’s your thing doesn’t mean … I know they’re not going to edit this out. Just because it’s your thing, it doesn’t mean it needs to be theirs.

I’ll share a little bit about my personal story just to kick things off. If this is the first time you’ve come to one of my videos or you’re on my YouTube channel, please subscribe to the channel. Please like this video if you like the content of it. We’re going to get really deep into how to swing them and how to bring your partner across. So if you like it, I’d love you to like it. If you’ve got some comments or some feedback on the video, that would be awesome. Please don’t be too harsh on me. If you’ve got a video that you’d like me to record or a question that you’d like to ask about investing in property, please chuck it down the bottom there.

My wife’s name is Lisa and together, I think we’ve bought 12, maybe 14 properties in the last eight years together. Some of these properties we still hold. A lot of the properties, we’ve now sold. So with my wife Lisa, I’d bought my first couple of investment properties on my own and then, we bought our third property together, which was a house for us to live in. She didn’t care too much about the first two properties. In fact, she wanted nothing to do with them at all and I didn’t really talk to her about them because they were in my name and it was sort of my passion at that time.

When we bought the house, obviously, it was our first home together. We were both really young and we sort of bought an old home and renovated it. She enjoyed that process, but what I’ve realised from going through this process with Lisa is she doesn’t really care about the market. She doesn’t care about the suburbs. She doesn’t care about all the data like I do. She doesn’t make her decisions about what to buy logically.

She likes to buy nice stuff that she could see herself living in. She likes to buy land and build really beautiful properties, and that’s been awesome for me as well because it’s meant that instead of buying all the old cheaper properties that I used to love and fixing them up ourselves, we now target a different type of property, which actually performs a bit better, but she says to me just straight out, “It’s not my passion. I don’t love it. It’s your thing. I trust you. Go ahead and do what you want to do.”

Then when we’re buying a house for ourselves these days, she obviously gets involved in. She adds her magic, which as an interior designer, she’s got plenty of that and helps turn it into a home and a beautiful investment property. To be honest, most of the properties that we’ve sold that have made great money have been a combination of that logic and emotional side sort of coming together.

So, the first part of actually getting your partner super excited about property is knowing what type of person they are and personality. So, there’s two types of people in my mind, but i’m a sort of black and white person. There’s logical people, which is probably less than 10% of the population and then, there’s emotional people, which is everyone else.

So, if you think your partner’s a real hard-arse and very logical, then you’ve got to present property in a certain way. If you think they’re a bit more emotional, even though they have cynicism and all the other things that our partners have in relation to property, you’ve got to remember that you’ve probably been watching these videos, reading blogs, listening to podcasts, learning and growing in your education and your risk profile to do with property now it’s calculated risk and you understand, it has really dropped where your partner’s still got all of that stuff that you’ve had to go through and taken time to learn about to get to this point. So, if your partner’s logical …

I see myself as a very logical person. Some of my family and friends call me like almost ice cold in some ways. I don’t mean to be. It’s just how my brain works. I just only really care about the data when I’m making decisions, unless it’s my own home with my wife, of course, but in terms of the logic, one of the best ways that you can talk to your partner if she’s a logical or he’s a logical decision maker is to sit down with them with a compound growth calculator, which you can Google online, so simple to use.

All you do is, let’s say you want to spend 400K, you put 400K into the compound growth calculator, you have an average growth rate of 5% per annum and you put in 20 years and then you press calculate and all of a sudden, your partner goes, “Holy shit, if we do this one little decision today, 20 years from today, the property’s going to be worth $1 million and we’ve just made 600K without having to work.” So, if you buy a couple of properties over time, obviously, you can really start to see the benefit longterm. Even logical people don’t generally think longterm, it’s the only way I think when making decisions these days. So, it’s really important to get them on board and to see the potential that you can see in your own mind of where this could go.

History is another fantastic tool to show a very logical decision maker how to or what’s happened in the past. So if you know your history, you can understand a little bit more about the future. You can’t predict it, but you can understand that things are probably going to be okay because I’ve yet to meet a single person that doesn’t want a better life for themselves or their family a year in the future than where they are today at least in Australia. So, history is powerful.

If you know that in the last 46 years in Australia, average houses in Brisbane, Sydney and Melbourne have all gone up by at least 9% per annum. If you knew that in the last 20 years that houses in Sydney, Melbourne and Brisbane on average have gone up by over 8.5% per annum, then when you’re playing around with predictions at 4 or 5% moving forward into the future, you know you’re being very conservative and cautious. Even in the last 10 years where the world went through probably the second worst recession or depression since the Great Depression, property prices in Sydney and Melbourne still went up by over 7.8% per annum when you average it out. So, there is power in understanding your history because you can kind of think about the future in a different way.

There’s also an epic report that I read each month called the Herron Todd White Month in Review Report. If your partner’s on the fence with property investing and wants more data to make a better decision, it can be a really nice little tool. You can show them the property clock and show them where each of the different markets in Australia are at right now and it can be a really good tool  to help you guys go, “well, as a logical decision maker, they’re probably going to want to buy close to home because they don’t like risk,” but if you’re thinking about Brisbane as opposed to Sydney ’cause Sydney’s at the top and Brisbane’s at the start of recovery as if this video being shot in 2007, then you can start to sort of shape them because it’s no longer your opinion. It’s the opinion of somebody else in the industry.

RP Data, the Australian Bureau of Statistics, Michael Matusik, Residex all produce incredible data and sometimes presenting what somebody else is saying about the marketplace is a lot more powerful than what you’re saying about the market. Again, I think it’s important if you’re talking to a logical decision maker and trying to get them excited about it in a way that excites them to really have all of this information pre-prepared so, “This is the market that I like. This is why. This is the suburb that I like. This is why,” and walk them through that so that they can understand it as well. Then maybe point them in the direction of a couple of videos or something that are short and sweet that they can wrap their head around it and start to understand things the way that you do.

If you’re working with an emotional decision maker like my beautiful, awesome wife … Hey, doll. She won’t ever want … She just goes property is not her thing and she’s kind of like, “Just do your thing,” but for me, it’s my absolute passion in life. Again, start with the compound growth calculator because anybody who’s anybody is going to get excited by going, “I’m 25 years of age today, I’m 40 years of age today, if I spend 400K and it grows by 5, 6, 7%, or 4% per annum over the next 20 years, compounded over that time, then I’m going to be like almost well on my way to being financially independent and very well off just from that decision.”

If I buy three or four properties over my lifetime and hold them all for 20 years, I’m going to be wealthy and I’m going to be in the top probably 5 to 10% of Australian’s in terms of net wealth and you’re going to be financially free. You’re going to be kicking back. So, it can be very powerful to just go, “Hey, this is why we’re doing this because we’re going to end up here and I know there’s a short term sacrifice here because we’ve got to save some money to put it into this, but trust me, even being very conservative based on the history, it should work out.”

I like to talk to them about what their visions for the future is if they’re emotional. I like to talk about their goals. I like to talk about where they see themselves in 5, 10, 15 years’ time. I’ve never really met anyone that’s not in a job they love or working for themselves. It’s like, “Yeah, I really see myself working my ass off for someone else for the next 40 years of my life,” and then ending up on the pension, although that’s where 80% of the people that you know and 80% of Australians end up. If you don’t want to be flat broke, living off Centrelink and hoping that we have a heap of babies or let heaps of other people into Australia over the next 20 years, you’ve got to actually do something to not end up broke and on the pension and scrimping and not being able to travel, live the lifestyle that you want then.

If you’re 30 years of age, if you’re 20 years of age, if you’re 40 like seriously, who wants to wait ’til they’re 70 to achieve this stuff? It’s quite achievable to actually replace your income over a 10-year period of time if you’re aggressive, 15 years if you’re moderate and if you’re very low risk, a 20-year period of time if you just make a few smart decisions now. So talking about what’s important to you and them in the future is very, very powerful because it gets you out of this is where I am today and I’m in the grind to how do I want to be spending my time on a daily basis? What would the ideal day look like for you if you didn’t have to cash a check to do what you need to do to survive?

So, it’s really powerful to think about that stuff and that also pulls you through. So I’m a big believer in having long term goals. I’m also a big believer in having a vision for myself and my future and my life because whether we live once or whether we’re reincarnated or we go to heaven or you don’t believe in any of it at all, you’re here right now and you’ve got an opportunity to change your own future by making some smart decisions now.

I like to really get detailed on how I’d be spending my day and for me, it’s waking up. It’s doing like 5 or 10 minutes of meditation just ’cause I’ve got such an active mind. It helps me calm myself and make my day awesome. I then like to do some stretching with the kids, listening to some awesome music. Serves me right for wearing sunnies. I’m bashing them around everywhere here.

On an ideal day, I love to sit down and have breaky with the family and then, do some training or come into work and I smash my work day out because I love work, I love contributing and being productive at the moment at this stage in my life. Then I like to go home, chill out at the beach or go for a walk with the family, have a swim in the pool, like simple days, dinner together if possible. I like to do a bit of training on that day, like to take Friday, Saturday, Sundays completely off just to cruise. In the future, they’ll probably be a little bit less work and a little bit more lifestyle and a few more holidays and those types of things as well thrown in there once you’ve got whatever amount of income that you want, I want in the future coming in without you having to get out of bed.

So you’ve got that logical and you’ve got the emotional decision maker. If it’s not working and you’re not getting through, then just stop. This is what I learned with my wife. It wasn’t getting through. It wasn’t her passion and that’s completely cool. She’s so epic in everything else. It’s my passion. I don’t have to drag her along to the gym six days a week just because I want to look better myself. You know what I mean? Why do I have to talk about property with her six days a week just because it’s my passion and I want to get us financially independent.

So the thing that changed everything for me and got my wife on board was results. I think I’d bought five or six properties together with her and then, we were able to use, sell a couple of those and buy a property on the water pretty much completely outright that was brand new and she was like, “Okay, stuff’s changing, stuff’s getting better. Stuff’s getting a lot easier.” Not that she’s materialistic, but I could work for four days a week instead of five. We could go on cool holidays. Instead of just hanging around, we could have dinners and movies and date nights and do all that stuff. We could look after the kids in the way that we wanted to look after them, put them into better schools.

The results sort of speak for themselves and when you buy a couple of good properties and those properties perform well, if you own something in Sydney or Melbourne, just think about what’s happened in the last 6 or 7 years, then just get on with the results, man. If they don’t want to do it and they don’t want to put their money in, find a way to do it on your own and just set yourself up, and sooner or later because of that compounded effect of growth over time and if you buy at the right time of the market, they’re going to come around and go, “Shit, we’ve made $200,000,” and then all of a sudden, it’s not a “I’ve made it,” so like “We’ve made, this is our money” conversation, and it gets a lot easier to sell the story because you can see the results.

Two things I wanted to finish on. I don’t like to swear in these videos, but just stop talking shit. The reality is if what I used to do with my wife, and I’m really saying this to myself like there’s a mirror there and I’m looking back at myself, my wife, I used to talk about property with her every single day, every night. I’d come home with like five different properties with all my data and I’d try and get her excited about it and she’s just like, “Man, I don’t even want to talk about this with you in any way. I’m exhausted from my day or my week.” We’d go on a holiday and I’d be wanting to think about property and stuff and she’s like “No.”

So just stop talking about it. If it’s your passion, you keep learning about it. You get yourself the tools, the skills that you need to go and get the results that you want to achieve. If you really need that combined income and you’re in a really longterm relationship, then I completely get where you’re coming from from the servicing perspective, but for everybody else, just stop making your passion your partner’s and just get on with the actual doing of making this happen and stop making excuses that I have to get my partner on board. If you’re still waiting for your partner to jump on, it’s probably because you’re personally scared of actually doing something. So you’ve got to deal with that stuff as well.

Again, I say that like there’s literally a mirror behind this camera so I can see how awkward I look right now and I knew that when I was like “Lisa, Lisa, Lisa, let’s do something. Let’s do this,” I was really sort of saying, “I’m freaking out about doing something. I’m looking for your approval to go and do it.” I stopped needing that approval because I got more confident at what I was doing and I’ve got better at getting the results.

So, if all of this other stuff fails, which there’s a higher likelihood that it will, book a one-on-one strategy session with me over at I’m notoriously good at helping a partner understand property investing in a very simple and logical way, creating a plan for your and their future, and getting everybody excited about it because obviously, it’s infectious when someone’s so excited about something, but when that’s backed up with logic, then you guys, it’s a complimentary session. We’re not trying to sell you anything. It’s looking at where you are and where you’d like to go as well as how to get there.

That can be that little thing in a lot of cases that people need to just get that little bit of extra confidence. Sometimes as my wife says to me, “The people that are the closest to you have the least impact on you in terms of your decisions.” Because they’re so close to you, you don’t trust them as much. So sometimes getting some third party stuff, a few nice little nuggets of gold in terms of just little bits of information that help make them feel more comfortable can be a big thing.

So, I know I’ve talked way too much in this vid, but I hope you got some value out of it. Good luck with trying to convert your partner. If that doesn’t work, just convert yourself and just get on with the business of making it happen anyway. If you need your partner’s income, then just focus on making some more money or saving some more of your own money over the next 12 months. Get out there. If it’s the right time of the cycle, buy what you need to set you and them up for the future and eventually with results, they will come around. I can guarantee it.

So thank you so much for your time. Can’t wait to do another video with you. Please subscribe to the channel and talk to you again. Bye.

Ben Everingham


Ben founded Pumped On Property after building a multi-million dollar property portfolio over a 5 year period. His mission is to show you how to replace your income through property investing so you can do what you love…full time.